Wednesday, March 5, 2008


I went to to do some research. What I was initially looking to find out was if there was any board game in existence in the shape of a handgun. I remembered Professor Goeller's insight that there is a series of James Bond board games for every movie that came out, so I tried to see if any were in the shape of the gun.

In the process of doing this I discovered a game entitled "Before I Kill You, Mr. Bond".  Upon checking the reviews I noticed a rather comical subject heading: Cease and Desist, Mr. Bond: A Review of James Ernest's Totally Renamed Spy Game.  David Matchen, the reviewer, wrote:

James Bond had a stunning array of gadgetry at his disposal throughout the course of 20 (official) films--the garrote Rolex, the Aston-Martin DB5, the wrist launcher, the submersible Lotus...and yet, Bond's greatest weapon was never shown on film, the most feared item in his entire arsenal...

His attorneys.

Cheapass Games' humorous card game was originally named "Before I Kill You, Mr. Bond," until the legal representatives of Mr. Bond's owners (Danjaq, S.A. and the Broccolis) sent a "Before I Sue You, Cheapass Games" letter which brought the Bond appropriation to a screeching halt.

Ah, well. Rumor has it that the creators were aware of the possibility of receiving a "cease-and-desist" when they designed the game, and so smoothly re-released it as the rather-arch "James Ernest's Totally Renamed Spy Game." Lawyers. Gotta love 'em.

The game we are working on is based on Jack Bauer and Chuck Norris fighting one another in a race to be the one who defeats Osama Bin Laden. After talking to my teammates we decided that we too are aware that there is a possible cease and desist coming our way should this game become as successful as we hope it to be. "Jack Ernest's..." gives us one possible solution should such a problem arise, which is to make a farce upon the uncooperatives. 

The "Jack Ernest's..." game turned out to not be a gun at all, or even a board game, it was a card game. At this time I have not found a board game in the shape of a gun. I am now going back to in search of a board game in the shape of a gun.

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